The Ballad of N

Where has my gold dragoness gone?
Beyond the trees... beyond the plains.... beyond love?
Where has she gone?
Over the river? Over the rites of love?

Where has my gold dragoness gone?
Behind the fall... out of the hearts of the kind? No....
Where has she gone?
Flown to her own expectations.

I have waited here - torn by doubt, misery,
I have waited here - for her,
I have waited here - hoping only for a glimpse of her,
I have waited here... for my N.

But why won't she return? My heart grows cold.
Why will she fly to doubt?
Why can I not be the monster I am,
And not what I am not?

Why am I so oppressive to you,
When all I offered was love.
So now I must cry anew,
For you have found your "truth."

"Truth?" you say. "No, not I," it calls.
Yet, it is the sweeter poison to you?
To fly to doubt, to hate anew,
To press upon me the doubt of all those men?

I have waited here, for years on end,
Yet praying that my love might return.
Yet all I find is seas of doubt, plains of destruction...
Crack fields where I am all alone.

So I shall harden myself anew, pray for life,
And may my soul be blessed and cursed to remember,
The sweetest love, the fairest maid, who would not see me true.
The fairest love, the truest wing, but now... nothing.
That is who my N wishes to be?

May my soul always remember her name, first in joy, then in pain,
My burden all the same.
May my soul never forget the love she can yet bring.
N fly true. Fly true, beautiful soul
Fly true, if it may prove our love,
That is worthy anew.

-Unversed Poem by the writer known as "K."